The week in review

Worst week for Michael "There's Nothing More Loving than Sharing Your Bed" Jackson: More than 60 cops descend upon his Neverland ranch with a search warrant in connection with sexual-abuse allegations brought by a 12- or 13-year-old boy. The King of Pop is charged with multiple counts of child molestation November 20, and released on $3 million bond.

Best use of eyeliner in a mugshot: See above.

Best ruling for matrimonially inclined gay couples in Massachusetts: The state's supreme court says "I do" to same-sex marriage.

Worst escape route: Claiborne Lemar Maupin attempts to flee police by ducking under a moving train off Westwood Road November 20 and loses the lower part of his leg. Maupin was wanted for probation violations stemming from his 2001 conviction in the accidental killing of his cousin, Ta Tebb Tyler.

Best hostage escape: Out the window and onto the porch roof, the route used by a woman who'd been held in a gasoline-doused apartment in Norfolk for five hours November 20.

Worst day for armed robberies: A man wearing a towel on his head robs the Red Roof Inn around 7:20am November 22. Two men hit La Chata Mexican Grocery Store on Hydraulic Road about 8pm the same day.

Best sign the use of the N-word is unacceptable in any context at UVA: The Staff Union demonstrates at the UVA Medical Center November 21 in response to UVA patent and guest services director Myra Larkin's comment in a staff meeting: "I can't believe in this day and age that there's a sports team in our nation's capital named the Redskins. That is as derogatory to Indians as having a team called the Niggers would be to blacks."

Worst news for Delta Sigma Phi: The fraternity is suspended for dousing pledges with vinegar and urine.

Best decision for WVIR: Plaintiff Jesse Sheckler decides to accept a $1 million award after a judge says the $10 million a jury awarded him was excessive. The jury found that Channel 29 defamed Sheckler when it said police found drugs in his house.

Worst reaction to getting egged: Two men beat up a 13-year-old boy who egged his car on Halloween at Washington Park. Police arrest Michael Corey Sullivan, 33.

Worst flooding: The intersection of University Avenue and Emmet Street looks like a pond during heavy rains November 19.

Best presidential encounter: President Bush congratulates NCAA lacrosse champs– the UVA men's team– at the White House November 17.

Best way to let your boss know what you think: Richmond police officer Kenneth Bayne creates a website called to express his feelings about Chief Andre Parker.

Best gets for the Virginia Festival of the Book: Michael "The English Patient" Ondaatje, and Michael "The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Klay" Chabon.

Worst worry for Ondaatje fans: How to pronounce his name.

Best choice for sexiest man alive: Johnny Depp, so anointed by People magazine in its annual awards.

Worst potential nightmare for retailers: Buy Nothing Day is November 28, the biggest shopping day of the year.