No man's land: BDC opens the closet door
Always looking for new territory to forge, this week's Blind Date goes where no man has gone before out with two women!
Dating's always tough, but the same-sex dating scene offers particular challenges, including the fact that the pool of eligible partners is significantly smaller. Our couple, "Emily" and "Carrie" (who asked that their real names not be used), were up to the task. Emily's a 46-year-old writer and animal lover. Carrie's a 35-year-old med student from Richmond who has already earned a law degree. Will sparks fly? Are same-sex blind dates different? There's only one way to find out: Read on.
Emily and Carrie met for an evening of music, art, and fine fare. After all, what could be more Charlottesville than the first Friday night of the month on the Downtown Mall? After taking in the music and the scene, they settled in for dinner at Escafé.
EMILY: We met at Mono Loco. I was first to arrive. I'm always the first. I have a phobia about being late. I flunked the course on "fashionably late."
CARRIE: I got caught in Fridays After Five traffic. I called and left her a message when I knew I was not going to be there on the stroke of 7:15. She was completely prepared for me to be late, as she knew about all the confusion and traffic mess on the Mall. She had brought a magazine to read to pass the time and didn't make me feel one bit bad about being 10 minutes late. She really needs a cell phone!
EMILY: I thought she was attractive, self-confident, and had nice manners (she was apologetic for being late).
CARRIE: I was struck by how "mainstream" she appeared. No sparks, but I immediately thought that she had a pleasant face and demeanor.
EMILY: I'm not sure that Fridays After Five/First Friday is the best venue for a blind/first date. It's sensory overload with all the things to do– the art, the music, the various galleries. You have to ignore what's going on around you if you really want to talk and get to know the person. If the FAF band is popular and loud (which The Marshall Tucker band was), it's not a particularly good setting for learning semi-intimate things about the other person.
CARRIE: We stayed all of about 20 minutes and bailed in favor of a quieter place to talk.
Next, to Escafé for dinner...
EMILY: I had the grilled tuna.
CARRIE: I had the beef tenderloin... I recommend it highly. I also had a sushi appetizer (excellent) and the cabbage salad (awesome!) We exchanged bites of our entrées and shared the sushi.
EMILY: We shared dessert, which was a pretty kick-ass chocolate pie type thing. And yes, we used two spoons.
CARRIE: At times, the service was attentive and expeditious (sometimes a bit too fast, as our appetizer, salad course, and entrées came in rapid fire succession), but then when it came time to pay the check or get a coffee refill, fugettabout it.
And the conversation?
EMILY: I would have felt comfortable chatting until the wee hours of the morning. She was very smart and quite funny and obviously a very nice person. I appreciated the fact that she was a big dog person. Cats would have been an immediate deal-breaker. And I was impressed that she had gone to both law school and medical school. For a while after that, I did feel that my life goals were pretty unambitious.
CARRIE: I found it interesting that she was so well traveled and had spent considerable time just chilling in Europe on her own. I have always wanted to do that. I liked her spirit very much. She is a very kind soul, and she seems very grounded as well.
Anything you wish you hadn't said?
EMILY: I probably shouldn't have told her about the bodies buried in my backyard, but she was pretty cool about it.
CARRIE: No; I can't think of any stupid things that I said or did.
What happened at the end?
EMILY: We retrieved her dog, which was patiently waiting in the car, and walked him around the Mall. Actually, that was a very nice after-dinner activity (no joke).
CARRIE: We walked each other to the car and exchanged emails.
EMILY: No. Too soon.
CARRIE: No, a brief hug.
Would you go out again?
CARRIE: Yes, but I think for me it would be on a friend level...
ON a scale of 1-10...
Quote of the night:
"I probably shouldn't have told her about the bodies buried in my backyard, but she was pretty cool about it."
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