Saga of a supermodel: Colin walks the walk

Colin Steers (Photo courtesy of BravoTV)

When we last left Central Virginia's favorite mathlete-turned-model, Colin Steers, he had barely squeaked through the first episode of Make Me a Supermodel (BravoTV, Wednesdays, 10pm). Having had his catwalk appearance likened to a bobble-headed dog, Colin began this week's episode by practicing his walk in the contestants' house, noting in a voiceover, "My first trip down the runway was pretty much a total blackout."

So went Colin's first snippet selected by the editors, who rifle through miles of footage to craft dramatic personae and individual storylines. Colin, at this point, has been cast as the earnest newbie who is in over his (bobbing) head and whose sexual innocence is ripe for the plundering. In real life, he's a pre-med student at Carleton College who spends school breaks working with University of Virginia neuroscientists. But there's not even a hint of intellectual smugness to his bright-eyed and bushy-tailed character who always tries his best.

For this week's photo challenge, the model wanna-bes stripped down (yes, oglers, the show serves up soft porn on a weekly basis) for their transformation into candy. Host Tyson Beckford advised

them sternly that judgement would rest on how well "you express your candy," and added "It's going to be a sweet one," prompting the groan heard around the world. Colin's assignment? Embody chocolate. As the make-up artists worked on him, the camera first cut to a confessional moment in which he again mentioned being a 21-year-old virgin and then immediately switched to female contestant Kerryn gushing, "Colin, Colin, Colin... Wow! Wow!" (further fueling my deflowering prediction). As a production assistant drizzled chocolate syrup over his head for the photographer, Colin said earnestly in voice-over, "It's a lot harder to be a model than I thought."

Back at the contestants' house, Colin again practiced his walk, while the camera spent more time with other contestants and their developing narratives (e.g. "something happened" to homophobic Branden as a child). But the lack of air time is excellent news for our geektastic boy wonder. Remember Reality Show Rule #1–lot's o' facetime means a contestant may well be ousted by the end of the episode.

Meanwhile Tabitha, the scariest contestant from Sheer Genius' first season, who now has her own show, Tabitha's Salon Takeover (please don't ask me how I know these things), arrived to intimidate the models with makeovers. Spared a humiliating overhaul, Colin received little camera attention; just a single shot where he remarked with wry and charming self-effacement, "You can't really improve on perfection."

At the final catwalk challenge, Tyson paired the models and matched Colin with Salome, winner of last week's photo challenge. Backstage Colin dutifully continued to practice his walk, and then, wearing a kelly-green Members Only-style jacket, held his head perfectly still as he moved down the catwalk, commenting in voiceover, "I'm feeling playful, fun, colorful– everything this walk is supposed to be."

After the judges reviewed his photograph, however, Catherine Malandrino lamented in her thick French accent, "With chocolate, we want to eat you, but in this case, we don't want to!" Nevetheless, all agreed Colin displayed "fantastic" improvement in his walking skills, and Tyson announced, "Colin, you're taking direction well, but step it up." (Next stop, Carnegie Hall!)

So, our local looker survived another week, and along the way, he cemented his role as the hardworking, sweet boy whose cherry will be popped before he leaves the show.