Paramore

OK, probably gonna catch some heat for this one, but as teen Hot Topic pop-punk goes, Paramore are actually pretty great, almost like where No Doubt should have gone fifteen years ago instead of "Hella Good" and all that. The guitar mix on "For A Pessimist I'm Pretty Optimistic" might have made for the best album-opening gut-punch in 2007 rock, we're guessing Misery Business would make a great soundtrack for knocking someone's ass out with a lunch tray, and the slow build to the chorus in Crushcrushcrush is somehow enough to make up for, uh, the rest of it. You just have to take it in little pieces, see? Like you have the attention span of a 14 year old.

Relient K opens with Christian alt-rock tunes we haven't bothered to listen to, but since they're written by the guy who produced Owl City's weenie-rock mega-smash "Fireflies", they're probably entirely competent and not terribly original. Please don't let that scare you away from your only chance to catch certifiable little hellion Hayley Williams in the flesh, though.