Saintly move? Poet thieves return St. Maarten's sign

Looks like the people who stole St. Maarten Café's sign had a fit of remorse, which even inspired some poetry.

"I came around the corner last night after having dinner and there it was," says Nicole Hamilton, who is re-opening the restaurant with her husband Russ and several local investors, "bolts too, sitting against the wall."  

On Tuesday, March 6, Hamilton was close to tears after she discovered it missing. She asked that it please be returned, and said the owners would not press charges. 

"We plan on giving it and the wall a good cleaning and getting it rehung very soon," she says. "There was almost no damage to the sign, so I think it was taken out of respect and love of Maartens."

Indeed, Hamilton received an email from the thieves before it was returned, in the form of a poem:

To the good people of St. Maarten's,
Please give a moment to make amends.
We thought your bar was closed for good,
And wrongfully stole your sign made of wood.
We're truly sorry, we mean you no trouble,
Your sign will be back, right on the double.
Returned to the cafe later tonight,
Give us a chance to make things right.
We're dreadfully sorry we caused such a fuss,
All that we ask is you please forgive us.
Just one wish, we think it is small,
Would you name a burger after us all?

"My husband and I thought this was pretty funny," says Hamilton.

So will a burger get named after the burglars?

"We're still debating that," she says. "Some of our regulars liked the idea and others didn't.  We shall see."

Read more on: St. Maarten Café


How nice of the Hamiltons to decline pressing charges. However, the apparently remorseful thieves should serve a little jail time for committing bad poetry.

Instead of a burger, how about a hot doggerel? Glad it's back!

They should call it "The Purloined Burger".

They should name it "The Dumas Burger" ... pronounce as applicable

I approve this Saintly move and welcome the returners into the heavenly embrace of the firmament and hope they understand the many years they will have to spend in purgatory for their poetry

Charlottesville- clearly a vital little community...(yawn)

At the risk of encouraging such thievery (actually encouraging making amends?), I think St. Maarten Café should hold a public contest to name the burger, with the winner receiving one such burger for free after re-opening. Good press to announce the triumphant return of the restaurant!

Morey, spot on!
The poets sure ain't no Martin Newell. These words are as bad a Dave Matthews lyrics...formulaic, trite and covered ad nauseum. No doubt written by a Sweathog.

R.I.P.: Robert Reed

The main gist of all these comments is seriously that these thieves are bad poets. Seriously. "If I were to steal a restaurant sign and return it, I would write much more profound and evocative poetry..." Amazing.

I agree with Jed.

It would be a great way for St. Maarten's to get some new faces in the door. Let the burger naming contest begin!

"The Bandit Burger"

The Burgerlar

Sadly, the name Hamburglar is already taken, and they're not even using him these days.

It could be good to work in St. Maarten's seafaring theme. Something like "The Poetic Pirate", or "The Captain Jack Borrow", or "The Plunderburger"?

Not great, but surely there's a magical combination to be had. Any local non-burglar poets want to give it a shot?

I love Jed's pirate-themed suggestions. They fit the spirit of the bar, and I once was awarded the "pirate in a previous life award".

Nicole and Russ, I am so happy you guys are reopening! I was very sad to hear the news. Will my mug have a place under new ownership. Hope all is well, you will definitely get my business next time I am in town!

Just to reiterate Enclave, some of the commenters here are ridiculously pretentious. No one cares if YOU could write better poetry or not, which is clearly what you are insinuating.

Quit complaining about every little perceived affront to the English language, and go bash your testicles against a brick, you bohemian hipster sluts.